Sep. 6th, 2005

We decided to take a break. I hate it, but it needed to happen. I know that relationships take work, but I am working so hard at everything else, that I just couldn't give anymore. I keep thinking though that there should have been another way, and that if I just push harder, I can keep it going. I just don't know how.
I hate the idea that I have hurt someone that loves me, and that I love. Everything is just so fucked up. I know that I brought it on myself. I always do, and I don't know why I expected anything different this time. I'm no good at relationships, maybe I never will be. I think I should just stop trying. What is the point anyway? Any guy that comes my way that might remotely be good for me, I run off at an alarming rate of speed.
And, you know what? He told me that he's been thinking about it for a few weeks, and that it is probably the best thing. He's right. I'm no good for him. I'm no good for anyone. I quit. I can't keep getting my hopes up anymore. It isn't worth feeling like this. It always ends up feeling like this. I'm done.

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pandorablue

July 2012

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