Hmmmmmm...
May. 24th, 2005 10:56 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
I had a very long discussion with a friend the other day. We were discussing cutting. Why we do it and why we haven't been doing it. I realized that my new fascination with *The Scene* probably has a lot to do with it. When Sean and I broke up, I wanted to cut. I thought about it every day. I didn't do it, but I REALLY wanted to.
It's like the cutting was the release for all of the pent up stress that I let take over. I am getting a bit more fascinated with the whole Kink Scene, and I wonder if that is why I haven't wanted to cut. I was never interested before, but now I am looking at it differently. I wonder if I will just replace my cutting habits with this, and if that's a good thing (or a bad one)? I don't know anymore. I mean at least if I decide to investigate, I could hardly choose a less threatening partner than J. I know he won't hurt me in an unpleasant way, and he knows that this is *mostly* new to me. I don't know.
I'm sure that all of you would rather know less about my sexual habits than you do (congrats Nikki, I'm sure that you are *REALLY* enjoying this thread)! But, I know that I won't be judged, and I don't really have people to talk to about this stuff. Anyway, I am retarded.
I love you all, LOTS
It's like the cutting was the release for all of the pent up stress that I let take over. I am getting a bit more fascinated with the whole Kink Scene, and I wonder if that is why I haven't wanted to cut. I was never interested before, but now I am looking at it differently. I wonder if I will just replace my cutting habits with this, and if that's a good thing (or a bad one)? I don't know anymore. I mean at least if I decide to investigate, I could hardly choose a less threatening partner than J. I know he won't hurt me in an unpleasant way, and he knows that this is *mostly* new to me. I don't know.
I'm sure that all of you would rather know less about my sexual habits than you do (congrats Nikki, I'm sure that you are *REALLY* enjoying this thread)! But, I know that I won't be judged, and I don't really have people to talk to about this stuff. Anyway, I am retarded.
I love you all, LOTS